School, noise sensitivity, and Head Lice

Nothing like a health issue to get me blogging again... :o)

First, the kids started public school back in August and had a pretty tough time adjusting. Being gifted means they have sets of behavior that can cause problems for the kids in school or at home. One behavior that is common to all my kids is noise sensitivity. This was an issue at the other school they attended before homeschooling, and it continues to be an issue, especially for the younger two kids. Put a gifted kid with noise sensitivity in a room full of loud misbehaving kids and you have a recipe for an unhappy child. Believe me, if there was a way for the public schools to deal more effectively with this issue, all kids would benefit! My kids are quiet and listen in class, and the teachers have all told me over and over how much they appreciate having such a child in their class -- IMHO, well-behaved kids comes down to parental supervision, discipline (not punishment), and teaching just basic manners. How simple could it get, yet most parents seem to shirk these duties with their children. I don't know, but I've seen so many kids get away with things that my kids would get grounded for. I must be doing something right.

My 11yo seemed to adjust the best and it only took him about two weeks to stop asking to stay home. He's been pulling all A's academically and has just about finished the math book that the rest of the class still works in chapter 5. Socially, it has been a bit awkward, but he still plays hockey weekly and that has been the case even while we homeschooled. Not much of an issue for him.

The 7yo took about two months and it did not help matters that the first day of school was on her birthday! She's decided there are some things about school she likes, though she often asks to stay home because the other kids are too noisy. She enjoys the days when she has art and her sharing time, and she likes her new friends.

Our 13yo girl, however, still has adjustment issues, partly due to the fact that she's more mature, in general, and lacks the social skills to maneuver around the teenage world. She gets along with adults just fine, it's those her own age with whom she's having trouble. It took her about 6 weeks to decide that the jocks she had been sitting with (girls) were ignoring her too much and started to sit with other girls who could be considered "outsiders". She feels better around them, even went to a movie with one of the girls (Twilight, of course!), but still feels uncomfortable in the whole social scene. She's fine academically, though. All A's and B's -- in honors classes, etc... She actually told me on several occasions that she likes having homework! The noise sensitivity is still an issue with our oldest, but not as much as it used to be; she just comes home mentally exhausted every night and has to recharge by herself in her room with her budgies and music. Now we have her enrolled in Tae Kwon Do and, so far, she loves the physical challenge involved.

We continue to work with her, but, unfortunately, as was the case with me, I never fit in traditional public school until I got to college where I finally felt "at home" in a tough academic environment with other people who liked the same challenges. Public school bored me and I was never a part of any "group" because I thought cliques were dumb (still do, and I wish the adults in the lives of these children would encourage a more cooperative approach to friendship). I see history repeating itself in my daughter, but at least this time, she has loving support from her family -- something I never had growing up. Our oldest has another four years to go after this year is done -- seems like a long road, to her. I hope we can get her into some college-level courses asap.

On to Head Lice.
If you've never had head lice, count your blessings! While the little bugs don't do any harm and won't kill a person, they are so uncomfortable that they are crazy-making! We only just discovered the bugs on my two youngest kids and me last weekend, right at the end of the holiday break. Now, keep in mind that lice apparently like clean heads -- the myth of dirty heads and lice has been proven false over and over again. We live in a very nice home, eat healthy, etc... I have no idea where the lice came from, but because my son had it the worst, the only place I can think of is from hockey (lice is well-known to be spread within sports teams).

I did the pesticide creme rinse treatment on everyone in the family, combed as many of the critters out that I could comb, heat treated all bedding, bagged soft toys, and waited. The kids got tossed out of school yesterday for still having nits and young bugs on them.

The only treatment the school nurse suggested, because the bugs are pesticide resistant, was using Olive Oil -- plaster the hair and scalp with it to smother the critters, leave it on for 5-6 hours, wash, then nitpick. From everything I've read, the nitpicking is KEY. So, this morning, we get to pick critters off eachothers' heads and hope they are cleared for school tomorrow.

Here are a couple informational links to help people understand lice and the olive oil treatment (don't bother with mayonaise -- disgusting, smelly, and, guess what the main ingredient is: olive oil!).

Great description of the use of olive oil for smothering lice. http://www.aogc.org/house1.htm . I've read to leave the olive oil on anywhere from 15 minutes to 12 hours, but I noticed after 3 hours, my head stopped its infernal itching which told me the critters were no longer active. The critters will go dormant very quickly when they can't breathe, but it is the longer-term smothering that will kill them (they can't stay dormant forever). I washed my daughter and myself after four hours, my son washed after 5. The itching is gone, but now it is time for the nitpicking! I had to buy a metal comb as all my kids and myself have very fine hair -- the plastic nit combs do NOT work on fine hair! Just forget it and spend the money on the good metal comb.

The following describes anecdotal evidence related to different lice treatments as seen through the eyes of some Harvard scientists (they like pesticide treatments, BTW -- ick!). The interesting part, I thought, was the quick test of the olive oil treatment that showed olive oil killed the lice in two hours:
http://www.hsph.harvard.edu/headlice.html#Suffocating

If I think of anything else to write, I will post it here, but I thought it was interesting to note that we spent five years in one public school considered very rural and poor, and had no lice problems. We homeschooled for three years without any lice problems. Then we moved the kids to another district (more academically challenging) and within four months, we have LICE! Egad! I never had lice as a kid, now I have to deal with it as an adult. Never in my wildest dreams...

Homeschooling travails

Our family has experienced a lot over the past couple of months that has caused quite a lull in learning. When a mainstream family has issues, the kids can sometimes remain oblivious, keep their same schedules, go to school and leave, even temporarily, whatever situation they may have. Homeschooled kids get to stay home and experience EVERYTHING when their families change; the good AND the bad. I would call this experience a good thing because learning how to bounce back from bad experiences teaches a valuable lesson in perseverance and forgiveness.

In our case, our situation has changed so much that as of September, we will no longer homeschool our children; rather, they will (we hope!) attend a public school not too far from home. I have decided to get a job for a variety of reasons, and with my husband's support, we made the decision to re-enroll the kids. This is not to say that we "failed" at homeschooling; on the contrary, I believe it was the best experience we could have provided our children at the time.

Amazingly, our oldest has warmed to the idea very much. This is a complete polar opposite in attitude and emotional stability from the period of time three years ago that caused us to pull our kids in the first place. I was so afraid that she would relapse and have problems sleeping, periods of extreme anxiety and such, that I actually hesitated to broach the subject with her. However, contrary to what I expected, she has been an amazing source of strength for herself and for us as we go through these changes. I'd like to think that our three-year experience with homeschooling has taught her to believe in herself and her ability to adapt to different situations.

Assuming all our kids are accepted into the neighboring school district (we can not, in good conscience, put them in the same district that caused us so much pain), they will receive gifted services that they never got before. We may even be able to whole grade accelerate all of them, assuming testing and evaluations suggest this would be the best course of action. Amazingly, this was a huge relief to our son, the fact that he would receive academic challenge appropriate to his learning level and style. I had no idea the academic part of school was so important to him until I informed him of our options.

Our youngest will be a whole different story, though. Having never been schooled and being an extremely independent learner, we fully expect to have to work very closely with the school and her teacher(s) to make sure her independent spirit is not squashed beyond repair. She has been quite a handful for us, so I can only imagine what a public school teacher, with 25 other kids to deal with, would experience with our youngest daughter. She's strong-willed, but not out of control; we can only hope for the best for her and work hard to advocate for her when necessary.

I will continue to use this blog to post about gifted issues that we face on the road to public school in the fall and while there. Please wish us luck and keep in touch!